The sun sets on another day...
I was semi mesmerized at sunset today has the clouds closed in and the weather tried to decide what it was going to do. There are lots of possibilities right now as it is cold enough to snow but the sun keeps warming the air just enough to keep it from doing so.
Today I was faced with a significant number of unique questions. These were both for myself and for the people around me. At the top of my list was a discussion I had with my son and youngest daughter. I am often amazed at the insight they both can show even though they do not have a significant amount of experience or a breadth of friends who can impart knowledge to them. Still as we were talking about a number of issues that they are facing right now I was at peace knowing that at least in some part they were prepared to face issues as they came forward and prioritize or eliminate them.
As I sat thinking alone for a while, I thought about what a parent should be. A lot of people have a lot of opinions on this. A lot of scholars have a lot more opinions on this but as I considered it, I realized that the only people that know what a parent should be are the children who had parents. Even then it is based on their opinion based on their parents and is not all encompassing. I find it amazing did some children think their parents are horrible while a child in the same family could think exactly the opposite. I know parents who have overdone and have failed horribly and parents that have under done and somehow succeeded. It makes the entire equation pretty much a mess.
As I continued to consider all of the families I had known and the positives and negatives of those families I realized there is no real answer except the answer that works. Sometimes a parent giving until there is nothing left is the right thing to do even if it leaves the parent a withered husk. Sometimes a parent guiding their children but letting them make mistakes is the right thing to do even though those mistakes may hurt. It is a tough series of choices to determine what is right and the responsibility a parent is paramount in a child's life.
For me I am proud of my children every day and feel I have given them a foundation for them to succeed. I will give them answers and suggestions, but I will never decide for them. I will relay my experience, but I cannot pretend that they are in the same world I was. I will catch them if they fall and hold them if they stumble but only if they want me. In the end they are the equation now and they as adults will be long after I am gone. As such I can only hope the foundations I have given them are strong enough to withstand nearly anything. I believe they are.
So as the sun sets on another day listen to your children and give them not what they want but what they need. Find the wisdom within yourself to see past the easy way and see towards the right way. In the end believe in your children for they are the future of you. I hope if you are a parent you find your way, no matter what .
Sleep sweet, love life, and happy parenting...