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The sun sets on another day...

Here today I continue my review of a friends post of things to tell your daughter. I have thought about them all, but this one is interesting. It states :'"Be less sugar, more spice, and only as nice as you’re able to without compromising yourself"

I thought about this a lot as I watched children and adults at an art fair and I truly believe it would be best modified for both boys and girls as "Be only as nice as you need to be without compromising yourself."


Well, the world have become an interesting place, in my opinion. It is hard to know who you can trust, and important to protect yourself quite well. No no, I do not mean going out and getting 2 bodyguards with rocket launchers but I do think we need to make certain we avoid getting ourselves into trouble. If we are too nice people can take advantage, and if we go too far, well, we lose our ability to stay distinct. I think the idea of being a little spicy may apply to both boys and girls, and making sure we keep our eyes wide open as we be "nice" is part of that really spicy self confidence we all need and deserve. Take a second, consider, has anyone ever taken advantage of you when you are nice? Has anyone taken all you have had to give and , well, given nothing in return?

It happens. But it doesn't have to, the choice, in my opinion, is to not allow yourself to ever be compromised. 

So as the sun sets on another day, enjoy the people you can trust, and be as nice as you need to be. Only you will know that niceness level and only you will be responsible, so be responsible, enjoy the moments, make sure you are in the control you need to be, and be happy every day with who you are, whether it be sugar, spice, snails or puppy dog tails, be you, and make you the best thing you can, no matter what.

Sleep sweet, love life, and have fun every day...

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The sun sets on another day...

A very successful day, I was hopeful, but it came. We all look for successful days, and we love the moments we can enjoy those successful days.

I have been going down a list of suggestions a friend posted, and today we have a new message: "Never walk through an alley alone."

you know, I thought about this for a while, not too long, nor too short. The message seems clear, but to me there is a bigger message. An Alley can easily be translated to a potentially dangerous unknown. those are all about us. Sometimes we pay close attention, and sometimes we are halfway down the alley before we realize where we are going.

The point is, sometimes we need strength in numbers to get past the potential pitfalls of the alley, and going it alone could be bad. The solution, take someone with you, or maybe a few or skip the alley and enjoy a better way. Life is full of choices that do not include walking down an alley, and maybe we should explore them a little before we saunter down the alley of doom. (Ha, sounds like a temple)

So as the sun sets on another day, well, life can be awesome, and we can make it awesome if we only try. Sometimes that means getting a little help, or making a better choice. In this case, I agree with this part of the list, going down an alley alone, well, it could be a bad choice, so don't do it alone.

Sleep sweet, smile bright, and don't forget to enjoy the eve....

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The sun sets on another day...

If you have been reading, I have been expanding on the note that another person posted for their daughter, and taking it up a notch.

The message for today is:

Happiness is not a permanent state. Wholeness is. Don’t confuse these.

This may be hard for some people to understand the correlation. so let's stat with a definition. Happiness is different for many people but is described as: "a state of well-being and contentment." Wholeness on the other hand is described in more complex terms as:  "completely free of wound or injury with nothing missing and everything complete, perfect, unbroken, and uncut; perfectly healthy and free of any defect, deformity, mistake or impairment having all its proper parts and components."

Easy right? Well, it could be. I think of happiness as a state of mind we can control, but often need external items to achieve. We can be happy or unhappy based on our wants and needs. We have a choice each day to be happy and many items affect that happiness. We can easily say that our happiness depends on our inner and outer needs, but in the end, the formula is different for everyone as some people increase their needs each time they are met, and others have very minimal needs. This makes it a moving target. Some people can be unhappy for reasons others will think are nearly silly, but they are quite real to the person who is unhappy.

Wholeness though is not such a moving target. You can be whole but not happy, and using that wholeness you can overcome unhappiness, and accomplish anything. There are many books and theories, but the end result is always happy is a temporary state, but being whole is more permanent. Make yourself whole, keep yourself whole and the rest will fall into place. Happiness will come to those thata re whole, well, usually, and they will survive and move forward. 

Of course, I don't sell insurance so I would rather everyone was whole and happy, but we will have to work on that, right?

So as the sun sets on another day, find a way to be whole, and seek happiness where you can. Perhaps if you find you are unhappy, take a look at your needs and see if they are what you want them to be, then make adjustments so you can find your way to making every day a pretty good day. I think we can all do it if we try, and realize we are capable of anything, no matter what.

sleep sweet, love life, and laugh a little, it makes for a good night...

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The sun sets on another day...

The sunset tonight was striking. Taking your breath away, or at least taking my breath away just by slowly setting then suddenly disappearing over the horizon. There was no planning, the sunset was the sunset, and as always it was unique.

I have been writing for several days based on a list presented by someone I know. the next item on that list was:

You are a woman, you do not NEED a man!

I would like to redefine that statement and simply make it:

You define you, no one else makes you who you are. You only need you to be you.

I know I know, to my daughters it would work, to my son I could say he did not need a woman, but in reality the truth probably lies in in the middle. We do not need others to define who we are, we need to define who we are.

I have seen so many people look to others to define their lives, They do so by never truly understanding who they are in life and along the way, they get lost. I have also seen some truly strong people that define themselves through diversity and would never let another person make them into what was wanted, instead they are the product of their own making and work diligently to make it that way. After all, in a relationship the only thing you can offer is you, so if you don't know you, how do you know what to offer. Moreover, if you truly "need" someone, what is missing and isn't it an opportunity to grow? Isn't part of life defining who you are and making that person that you are someone who is independent all the time?

Lots of questions.

So as the sun sets on another day, it is my opinion that you should consider that "you only need you to be you". Everyone else is a benefit (or a detriment(oh I hope not)). Consider well the people in your life and find those people that believe in you, life you up, and make your days better each and every day, no matter what.

sleep sweet, sing a song, and laugh at the moments...