The sun sets on another day…
Where did the cold come from? It’s a dumb question I know but it got a little cooler today and even though it was no longer warm, the sunset was beautiful, and I smiled as the sky opened and showed its colors.
I was reading about problems and how people resolved them again, and the particular quote called out to me. I won’t say it exactly because it is buried inside of a book that I read, but the idea is if you are fighting against somebody think about why. Are you fighting against the person or are you fighting against a problem and focusing on a person. That’s an interesting and difficult issue to consider, simply because a lot of people fight and they’re not really sure why later and if they actually consider it, the problem may not be important at all.
I try to avoid fights. It was funny, when I was 15, my next-door neighbor wanted to pick a fight with me. He did everything he could to start a fight with me because I was bigger, and I was that person that was different than other people. Yes, I was a nerd. I spent more time reading and learning than I did running around on the streets with a bunch of hoodlums that thought I should be hanging out with them. Oops.
Anyway, this gentleman thought that he was going to make a name for himself by beating me up and couldn’t get a rise out of me and finally hit me hard. Well, I think he thought he hit me hard, but I barely felt it and simply told him that I did not want to hurt him.
Everything deescalated after that, and he kept his distance from me until we moved again like we always did. I learned later that the fight he wanted to start was because he was being picked on as not being tough enough by his friends and he was going to prove that he was tough. I was not the problem; his friends were the problem. I was just in the middle of it all for no apparent purpose.
There was no reason to fight, he could have explained the situation, and we could have worked it out where he looked better because I honestly didn’t care. I defined myself as who I was and didn’t need to prove anything to anyone. Yes, this is a dumb example, but most of my writing is stream of consciousness so it came out. Oh well.
When you’re fighting is your problem with the person you’re fighting or with something else? Have you ever thought about that? In a relationship are you fighting for the sake of fighting or fighting to solve a problem? Wouldn’t it be better if you worked together?
So as the sun sets on another day, welcome to another day of dumb questions. I hope you find solutions in your life and not create more problems for yourself. Win or lose, we often lose more than we win. Thanks for reading along and I hope you have a peaceful night, no matter what.
Sleep sweet, love life, and make the world better…