The sun sets on another day…
Sunset was awesome, followed by nasty icky wet cold icy rain. Where did that come from?
If you are following my Sunday book list/review/goodreads/or whatever you will know I read a book called “The 48 Laws of Power” last week. I have been trying to vary my reading and in doing so focus on a wider variety of books allowing myself more and more viewpoints. The aforementioned book I considered a non fiction and read it with a little more time involved than usually as it was well over 700 pages. (Higher but I don’t count indices and footnotes). I want to focus on one particular chapter of this book for just a moment. (Maybe 2)
One chapter focuses on friends and enemies. The opening is rather interesting with this fun statement:
"Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. … If you have no enemies, find a way to make them."
I found myself considering this statement for far too long. It haunted me, not because it was true or false. The author notes it may be both. It haunted me as my biggest sorrows in my life have been from friends as enemies have no effect on me. Why? Why which you probably ask but the big why is friends can shove a knife into you and rip your heart out. The trust you give them allows them to affect how you see the world, and in that the author was correct, a great friend can be a formidable enemy, even if they are unaware of it.
Years ago I trusted someone close to me. I considered them a friend and as we interacted I trusted them with my front, back, side, and well, everything. We talked often, and in the process learned many things about each other. I was surprised to find this friend was taking my thoughts and using them to align themselves in a better position. I also found that outside of my sphere I was belittled, attacked, and the seething hate some had for me was fueled more by this person.
To understand you have to know that at one time I was relatively ruthless. Since those outside of my friendship had no influence on me I was given jobs that were pointed and sometimes involved eliminating resources. A great many times in my life if I arrived at a location people wondered who was going to be fired, or how bad things were going to get. With that in mind I gathered a great many enemies, not because I wasn’t justified in my actions but because people sometimes will not take responsibility for their actions, and it was easier to blame the messenger.
My “friend” knew I was not affected by how people reacted but they needed leverage and used peoples hate of me to garner respect, and secure a position they were not qualified for. It was difficult when I learned all of this. Very difficult, but I let it go as it taught me a lesson: Trust your friends but be aware of the source of your enemies.
Consider well that this quote is accurate but inaccurate. My altered approach to this quote would be “Friends can be worse than enemies so choose your friends well, and choose your enemies even more wisely as both can be your saviors and your undoing.” Interesting huh?
So as the sun sets on another day, I have thought too much about this and now am focused on a series of much lighter novels. I hope you have good friends. I hope your friends will always be there for you, and if I count you a friend know that it means more than you can imagine. Take a deep breath, find your way, and you are your best source of power, no matter what.
Sleep sweet, love life, and carry it on…