The sun sets on another day…
I have said before that it could be surmised I am in love with love. As I have grown I understand it is more complicated than that. I have realized I am in love with the purity of passion, and the power it holds over all of us. I find love is so misdefined by so many people as to be definitionless. (My word). If you ask a dozen people their definition of love you may well get a dozen definitions. Mine has changed over the years and both widened and focused in scope as well as defined a series of subsets that allow for nearly infinite types of love.
Attraction is a bit different. Where love is deep and wide and perhaps infinite, attraction can be more finite. Thea Alexander once surmised that attraction is like tuning forks, and people are attracted for perhaps unknown reasons based on a series of criteria that are almost “mystical”. A book I read much later expanded on this noting there were criteria we noted. Yet another book and study in anthropology notes it has more to do with species and genetic diversity, while another notes it is more mental.
I say they are all correct. Over the years and a strange set of circumstances I have come to the conclusion that we are a lot like chords on a piano. When played together we either sound awesome or we don’t. Some chords sound better than others, and some are in sync. It is not so simple as a tuning fork but instead allows for multiple levels of attraction. I believe there are 4.
In my opinion we are attracted to each other based on the following: Intellectual, Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual. This is a slight variation from some thoughts as spiritual is a wildcard but I have found it to be an important portion of our makeup.
Intellectual seems easy but there can be several ways of looking at it. It does not mean we are as smart or equal, it means we have the ability to connect on that level and grow together. This includes the combination of skills necessary to allow us to communicate and understand. A lot of this has to do with wanting to connect on this level and it is a wildcard in my opinion.
Emotional is more intense. In my opinion it does not mean you both feel deeply or don’t feel, it means you can understand each other from an emotional level. It is this area where I often fail as I do not think many can easily understand the depth of my passion or the focus I have in many areas. By passion I don’t mean anything other than that overwhelming feeling of commitment to something.
In my opinion physical is where a lot of people get stuck. They look for the physical attraction without the other pieces. Before the Web Social Media age, physical online was not important. It was text based and you started knowing each other mind to mind, now it seems as though some people are in a shallow rung of looking at physical and swiping by people.
Spiritual to me is a tricky item. Your desires and beliefs have to coincide or be mutually allowable to meet here. “Like” spiritual beings attract. I find though that if people actually understood many of their spiritual beliefs they would be more in line. I have also considered this to be part of intellectual and emotional, but that is up to you.
My point is, and the reason for this overly long post (compared to many), we can see in a short time the people who can mean something in our life. We can align pretty easily. We can choose to grow together or not grow together and in the end, if things don’t align we should be able to see why. A good example is if someone does not want to hear the other person on an intellectual level, things will have a hard time. By the same token, if someone does not see the emotional importance of something, it will cause issues. The complexities arise when there are combinations. A person who ties emotional depth to physical interactions is doomed if they meet someone who finds physical and emotional are not related. A person who sees emotions as part of intellect may have issues with someone who focuses on intellect and not emotions. On a positive note and best of all, there are people who see each other and just connect. They sparkle and fall into each others arms, and maybe those people just keep going.
The complexities are endless. In the end, this is all an opinion and may mean absolutely nothing. (but I could write for days on the subject with intense examples) You need to decide for you, and only you know how you work.
So as the sun sets on another day, I hope this wasn’t a waste of time and instead hope it means something or at least gives you something to think about. I hope you find someone who makes you sparkle, and they sparkle back, and along the way I hope you have an amazing time each day, no matter what.
Sleep sweet, love life, and keep loving…